


I'm Dying

by akashaflipsdesk



Category: The Evil Within (Video Game)
Genre: Blood, Gen, Hurt, I'm not good at tagging, Implied Character Death, Wounded, kinda implied joseb, more sad stuff
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-08-01
Updated: 2015-08-25
Packaged: 2018-04-12 10:18:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,413
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4475663
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/akashaflipsdesk/pseuds/akashaflipsdesk
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sebastian knows he's dying and he knows he should call for help... but there's something far more important he has to do.  If he's going to die, Sebastian has to make things right.  He has to call his partner.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. But I Can't Tell You That

**Author's Note:**

> this was both fun and infuriating to write... took me six drafts lol but overall, i like the way it turned out... and sorry for all the sad stuff i write... i swear i'll do something fluffy and cute soon ;A; maybe/hit   
> there will be at /least/ one other chapter to this.
> 
> This was inspired by a tumblr prompt by otpdisaster which can be found here: http://otpdisaster.tumblr.com/post/110731939970/person-b-knowing-theyre-undoubtedly-about-to-die

“Fuck.” Sebastian cursed as he leaned his head against the brick wall. His voice weak; devoid of its usual bite as the detective pressed his hand against his bleeding shoulder. Trying to keep as much blood inside his body as possible. Unfortunately, it wasn't doing much good as the blood began seeping through his fingers; soaking his tanned skin. How could he let something like this happen?

Swallowing, Sebastian looked down before gingerly peeling back his fingers to reveal a hole torn in his beige jacket. The hole stained a deep red as blood spilled listlessly from his wound. It wasn't long before Sebastian abandoned the hope he could stop its flow.

Lowering his blood-soaked hand – since he couldn't move the other without immense pain – the detective reached into his pocket. Taking his cellphone from inside, Sebastian let out a low groan before lifting it and flipping open the top. At first, Sebastian began dialing three familiar numbers, but paused when his sight started to falter and breath began to shake. Just before pressing the 'call' button, Sebastian realized he didn't have time to call for help. He was beyond saving at this point, it would be smarter to use his last moments wisely. Deciding he didn't want to waste what precious little time he had, Sebastian removed the nine and two ones from the screen. There was something Sebastian needed to do before he died… something much more important than saving a lost cause such as himself.

Sebastian needed to call his partner.

Not even two hours before ending up in this goddamn alleyway, Sebastian and Joseph had gotten into another large fight. One that had ended in bitterness and Joseph throwing a book at him. Refusing to let that fight be what remained with his partner, Sebastian decided to use what little strength he had left to apologize. To tell Joseph how much he meant to Sebastian… both as a friend and as a partner. Sebastian knew this would likely be his last chance to do so.

Working his bloodstained thumb over the buttons to dial Joseph's number, Sebastian cursed as it slipped clumsily and miss-dialed. The number – of course – was not accepted and Sebastian growled another obscenity before he tried again.

By some miracle, he was able to dial correctly this time and when he pressed the 'call' button, his phone began to connect. Lifting it to his ear with some effort, Sebastian waited and hoped Joseph would answer his call.

“What is it, Sebastian?” the bitterness in Joseph's voice almost startled him when the other man answered, but Sebastian couldn't blame him considering the fight.

“Hey Joseph…” now that the man was on the phone with him, Sebastian had to try and not grimace. He didn't need Joseph asking too many questions, “I… I just wanted to call you and… apologize for what I said… to you earlier.” now that his mind was clouded with pain, Sebastian couldn't even remember what that had been.

“Wow” the man said with exaggerated and obviously fake enthusiasm, “the great Detective Castellanos… apologizing?” he laughed a bit sarcastically, “I should probably be recording this. Otherwise no one will believe me when I tell them Sebastian Castellanos is actually _apologizing_ for being an insensitive and bull-headed _prick_.” despite the sarcasm and snark in his tone, Sebastian let out a soft laugh.

“I… I'm trying my best over here.” his sight blurred for a moment as he spoke. Knowing he had to hurry this up – say what needed to be said – Sebastian continued with the apology, “Look, Joseph… I realize now that I… that I've been a really shitty partner lately”

“No kidding”

“and I just wanted… I just wanted to say thank you.” there was a pause on both ends of their call, “You… you've been there for me these last few years… even after… everyone else gave up on me. You helped me through Lily's death and Myra's disappearance… and now I realize that I… that I never properly thanked your for that…” again, the man on the other line was silent. However, it wasn't long before a disappointed sigh came from Sebastian's partner.

“Sebastian, are you drunk again?” Sebastian let out a laugh; a painful one.

“No… no, Joseph, it's nothing like that I’m just” _I'm just dying_

But he couldn't tell Joseph that…

“Just what, Sebastian? Because you sound pretty drunk to me.” through the haze and haste of pain, Sebastian hadn't realized the loss of blood was causing him to slur his words.

“I… Joseph, I swea” but the other didn't let him finish.

“Where are you, Sebastian? I’ll come pick you up.” the detective bristled.

“For _fuck's sake_ , Joseph, will you just _shut up_?!” Sebastian snapped at him, “I'm trying to apologize here. Look, I get it, you're pissed at me because I’m a goddamn piece of shit but fucking hell, could you keep your mouth shut for two seconds?!” Sebastian knew this would be their last conversation. He needed to make it count and the other needed to shut the hell up.

Joseph huffed in response, “Fine.”

“Look, Jo… I just… what I’m trying to say is that… you're the best friend a guy like me could ask for… and I’m really sorry for being a stubborn ass and never appreci” a cough ripped through his sentence, “a-appreciated all the things you've done for me until now. If I could, Joseph… if there was any way I could make it up to you… I would do anything to pay you back for all the shit I’ve put you through… because that's what a good friend – a good partner – like you deserves.” having been able to say what he wanted, Sebastian let out a sigh while his partner stayed quiet. It took him a moment before Joseph replied.

“If you really want to make it up to me, you can start by taking me out to dinner.” chuckling at the request and blunt sincerity in his partner's voice, Sebastian leaned his head against the brick wall behind him.

“A-alright… where” Sebastian breathed in heavily, his breath shaking as he exhaled. Everything was starting to darken around the edges of his vision as Sebastian struggled to keep his eyes open, “where you wanna go?” he didn't have much more time, he needed to finish this soon, “I'll take you anywhere, Joseph…” his breathing was slowing, turning labored and he just hoped Joseph was too agitated to notice.

“You can bring me to that place on 33 rd.” Sebastian smirked, knowing the exact place he was talking about. It was a bit expensive; but he had said 'anywhere'.

“Yeah… alright… so what's say Thursday, eh?” he swallowed, “Round six sound good?”

“The ambiance is better at night. Pick me up at eight.”

“It's a date.”

“Good, and don't you dare be late, Sebastian. Oh, and if you even _think_ about showing up drunk, I will put in for a new partner.”

“I… I won't show up drunk, Joseph… I can promise you that.” because he wouldn't be showing up at all.

“Good.” there was an air of finality to the word… but Joseph still hesitated before continuing, “And… are you sure you don't need me to pick you up?” there was a dash of concern leaking into the man's voice, causing Sebastian to smile in relief. Joseph obviously stilled cared; he wouldn't die with the man hating him. And for some reason, that put Sebastian at peace.

“Yeah Jo… yeah I’m sure… but I gotta go, alright? See ya… see ya at work.”

“Alright… goodbye, Sebastian.”

“Goodbye.” weakly, Sebastian lowered the phone from his ear and ended the call. After the call was ended, Sebastian dropped the phone into his lap before lifting his sight to the sky above him. Though mostly blocked out by red-bricked buildings, there was a sliver of bright blue sky above him. Untarnished by clouds or the usual gray tone Krimson seemed to be curse with lately. There were only a few other days like this… most recently being the day of Lily's funeral. He remembered how much he had hated it… but the thought of it made Sebastian think of Lily's loving smile.

“I'm going to see you soon, sweetheart…” he spoke softly before letting his eyes close. Heaving out a shuddering breath, Sebastian felt horrible for making plans he couldn't follow through with. But it seemed to be his lot in life the last two years… at the very least, the man was grateful that he got to say goodbye. As a detective, he knew something like that was a rare luxury. He didn't feel confident that the apology even remotely covered what he had done… but it would have to do.

Just as he was about to accept his fate – give in to the nothingness – Sebastian felt a hand suddenly touch his shoulder.

“S-Sir?!” turning his head to the side, Sebastian looked up to see bright green eyes looking back at him. Crouched beside him was a very worried looking girl with long, orange hair and a pale, freckled face. She was so close that Sebastian could feel her warm breath on his nose and cheeks, “A-are you alright?!” that was a _stupid_ question considering all the blood gushing out of his shoulder.

“N-not really…”

“I'll call an ambulance.” reaching out weakly, Sebastian attempted to stop her by taking hold of some thin fabric hanging from her torso… but all that accomplished was the man foolishly staining her sweater with blood.

“No… no s'okay… they won't make it…” despite his meager protest, the girl pulled out a green-cased cellphone and dialed. Pressing the phone to her ear a moment later.

“Hello? I-I need an ambulance… on the corner of Belhurst and Third. There's a man here and he's bleeding really bad.” she explained to someone on the other line. After a short pause and someone talking, she looked Sebastian in the eyes, “What's your name?”

“S-Sebastian… Castellanos.” his breathing was coming out in huffs now, his eyelids turning heavy.

“He says it's Sebastian Castellanos.” as she said this, Sebastian began to tip a bit, his eyes almost closing which prompted the girl to shake his shoulder, “H-hey, come on… d-don't fall asleep. You need to stay awake, please.” she was practically begging at this point. Though he didn't understand why; this girl didn't know him. His death wouldn't affect her life at all. However, he didn't have the strength to be an ass and point that out.

“I… I’m trying… really hard, kid.” he let his eyes close for just a second, but they were quickly forced open when the girl shook Sebastian's shoulder again. The force of her shaking causing his head to lean into her shoulder. There was more talking on the other line, but nothing Sebastian could make out.

“Uh… uh… okay, um, Sebastian? You… you got any plans this week?” he just snorted, but a smirk pulled across his face.

“Takin'… a friend to dinner… too bad I ain't makin' it.”

“Hey, don't talk like that… you're… you're going to be just fine. I promise.” as he leaned against her, Sebastian shook his head slowly and tried to speak… however, only incoherent mumbling left his lips, “Huh?” she prompted, trying to get him to talk, but her voice was beginning to fade into the distance. Soon, Sebastian began to feel like he was falling… sinking deep within himself until the girl he leaned against felt miles away.

“Just… tell Jo… I’m sorry…” even the voice leaving his own throat sounded like nothing more than a soft echo.

“Sir? Sir?! Sebastian, don't go to sleep! Hey!” he tried to obey her plea… but he just couldn't. Sebastian wanted to be stubborn, to hold on a little longer… hold on for Joseph and the stranger… but everything was starting to go black around him. After all the pain he had been through – the loss of his daughter and his wife's disappearance – there wasn't enough left in Sebastian that wanted to live. Too much of him wanted to give up; accept death's cold embrace. Fall victim to the darkness and decay that had already taken his little Lily. Maybe then… maybe then he could see her bright smile again…

There was still a hand on his shoulder, still the feeling of fabric against his temple where her shoulder cradled his head as she shook him. Trying her best to anchor him to the living world as he let go of her sweater. Unfortunately, Sebastian could barely feel anything anymore as his eyes began sliding shut. Those worried, green eyes of the girl desperate to save a complete stranger were the last thing Sebastian thought he would see.

Moments later, something that was still willing to fight forced his eyes open in stubborn resistance. The girl was still there, Still begging him to hang on… but what felt like a blink later, the girl was gone. Another blink and there were two people in her place. Leaning over him as he now lay on the ground. Their lips were moving, but the voices coming from their mouths were nothing but muffled mumbles.

Another blink, and he was inside the familiar confines of an ambulance.

And then his eyes slipped shut.

~o~

Joseph was still mad at Sebastian after getting off the phone with him. However, despite this anger, Joseph couldn't help the smile forming on his face. Through these last few years, everything he had done for Sebastian wasn't because he expected thanks or anything else in return… he did it because that's what partners were _for_. He did it because Joseph _cared_ about Sebastian and knew that if roles were reversed, Sebastian would do the exact same for him.

Still… after so many years of carrying the older male through his stubborn days and drunken nights… he couldn't deny that it felt _good_ to finally be thanked. As he walked through the hallways carrying an armful of the day's latest paperwork he had just finished, Joseph continued to smile. Though as he prepared to leave for the day, head home to take care of his cat, a small twinge of guilt began to form. Joseph began to feel a bit selfish for letting the smile linger so long on his lips… this was not the reason you helped people.

Joseph quickly convinced himself that he had earned Sebastian's thanks, as well as the dinner he would be getting.

Continuing his walk through the precinct hallways in cheerful ignorance, Joseph was far too eager – and pleasantly surprised – to realize just how out of character the apology had been for Sebastian. His partner was not the type of person to give his thanks or apologize in words… and especially not over the phone. Sebastian, instead, preferred to show his appreciation with action and would apologize with sad attempts to right his wrongs (most of which ended in making things worse).

Joseph should have realized this.

Almost arriving at the file room, and more than eager to get finished up and get home, Joseph was suddenly stopped when he heard his phone ringing in the back pocket of his slacks. Letting out a soft sigh, Joseph moved to the side of the hallway so he would be out of the way before taking out his phone and checking the number. It wasn't one Joseph recognized, but decided to answer anyway in case it was something important. Clicking the green button on its screen, Joseph lifted the phone to his ear.

“Hello?”

“Hello, is this Joseph Oda?” he didn't recognize the female voice on the other line.

“This is… may I ask who is calling?”

“My name is April, I'm a nurse at Krimson Medical.” Joseph felt his body stiffen, arm tightening around the files he held. Why would the hospital be calling him? His question was quickly answered, “I'm calling because you are listed as the emergency contact number for Sebastian Castellanos.” his heart skipped a beat while a lump began to form in his throat. Swallowing hard, Joseph prayed that this was just some stupid bar fight. Nothing too serious, Sebastian was probably just out cold and would need a ride home once his treatment was finished.

“Um… that's correct. Why, what happened to him? Is Sebastian alright?” she was quiet for a long moment as something began dawning on Joseph. The very thing he should have known better than anyone else about Sebastian.

“I'm very sorry, Mr. Oda… but your friend has been shot.”

“Shot?!” his sudden yell caught the attention of his colleges who were passing by in the hallway, “Wh-what do you mean, _shot_?!” Joseph gripped his files tighter, now crumpling the folders. Most of the onlookers just rolled their eyes and continued on with their day. Most likely figuring out who the call had been about and not caring to hear it. Others stared with semi interest, giving looks of disgust and disappointment while a few looked on in sympathy… but the sympathy was more for Joseph than his estranged partner.

“Yes… and it doesn't look good.”

“D-doesn't look… but he just… he _just_ called me! We were talking and” panic settled in as Joseph became confused and wracked with worry. Suddenly, Joseph dropped the folders in his hand so he could place his hand on his head, “That's… that's…” he couldn't get out his words of denial.

_This couldn't be happening right now.  It had to be some mistake... some sick joke._

No longer concerned with the papers now strewn about the precinct hallway and co-workers who eyed him strangely, Joseph turned on his heels and began booking it out of the building. His phone was still in his hand with the woman trying to talk to him on the other line. Unfortunately, Joseph wasn't paying attention at the moment.

That idiot bastard, how could he do something like this?

~o~

Pacing in the hospital waiting room, Joseph gingerly wiped sweat from his brow with the back of his hand. He had run the entire way to the hospital and was now being forced to wait while Sebastian was in surgery. Of all the stubborn, bull-headed, idiotic things his partner had done… why did he have to do something like this? Why didn't that damn idiot call an ambulance? Why did Sebastian call him? Trashing the odds of his survival just to apologize for some stupid fight that now seemed like a petty argument...

What he hated even more then that was the fact no one would tell him anything. He didn't know where Sebastian was shot, hadn't been given updated on his partner's status. Nothing.

“You better pull through, you stupid bastard.” he mumbled before using a gloved finger to rub 'sweat' from the corner of his eye. Honestly, what was the man thinking?

“Joseph Oda?” the sudden female voice startled him, drawing him out of his thoughts and back to the present. Turning his head, Joseph took notice of the woman who had called his name. She was an average woman of about average height and build with dark skin, brown eyes, and curly dark hair that was tied in a pony tail. The woman also wore purple scrubs and had a name tag pinned to her chest. Unfortunately, she was too far away for Joseph to read it.

' _It's too soon for them to call me_ ' was the one thought that ran through Joseph's mind as he stood there, examining the nurse in front of him. He was too scared to approach her, knowing that an early nurse could only mean one thing.

Nevertheless, he needed to know what the woman had to say. Willing himself to move forward, Joseph walked toward her with his heart sinking into his stomach. He didn't expect to hear any sort of good news once he arrived at her side.

Stopping just in front of her, the detective found himself unable to speak. He was so worried about Sebastian that he couldn't even confirm his identity to her. As Joseph struggled to find some sort of words to speak, the pristine white walls were receding around them.  Leaving Joseph in a suffocatingly white expanse of nothingness where only he and the purple-clad woman remained.

As his breath caught in his throat, Joseph continued his struggle between panic, worry, anger, and words to say. Anything to confirm who he was or ask how Sebastian was doing. Thankfully, the woman in front of him was patient. Watching Joseph as he struggled internally with what to do. However, when it became clear he wouldn't be able to

she finally spoke.


	2. And Now You're Alone

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After reciving grim news, Joseph mourns the loss of his partner... and last remaining friend.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this took so long... ;u;  
> also, this was supposed to be much longer... but i'm having trouble figuing out how to approach the second portion of the chapter... so i figured i'd just post what i have and maybe sometime in the near future, edit the chapter to add the rest... or possibly post the rest as its own chapter.

Sitting in the waiting room, Joseph found himself unable to move… his thoughts devoid of anything other than what the nurse had told him.

_I'm so sorry, Mr. Oda… but you're friend… he didn't make it…_

Joseph didn't know how long he had been sitting in the waiting room; those words running amok in his mind. Playing through – over and over – as he gazed at the tiled floor. Finding himself caught between anger at the man… and being distraught over his partner's sudden death. Sebastian was his best – and possibly only – friend outside of Toronto… and now he was gone. Just like that.

How could something like this happen?

It felt like ages before Joseph finally gained enough strength to stand. He couldn't stay here anymore… he wanted to go home. Go to sleep and – hopefully – wake up to find this was just a cruel dream. That Sebastian wasn't dead and Joseph had fallen asleep on his desk again. However, as he left the waiting room and hospital behind, Joseph slowly became aware that this was not a dream. This was real… his friend was gone…

What was he supposed to do now?

Walking alone through the streets of Krimson, Joseph let himself doze… fade out of the real world around him and allowed his feet to take him anywhere they wanted to go. He expected them to take him home… but when he looked up, Joseph was surprised and a bit pained to realize where he really was. Looming in front of him was Sebastian's house.

It had become dark now and the moonlight cast upon the home made it look as forlorn as the man standing before it felt. The home always had a lonely and sad aura around it… but never this bad. Almost as if it too mourned the departure of its stubborn owner.

Slowly approaching the familiar stoop, Joseph pulled out his keys. Riffling through them, Joseph soon found his spare key to Sebastian's front door. Arriving on the porch, Joseph cringed at the low creek of boards bending under his weight. When he came to the door, Joseph hesitated. Almost feeling as if this were an intrusion… but he wanted to hold onto whatever memories he could right now. Reaching out, the man grabbed the door by its knob with one hand and unlocked it with the other. Turning the knob, Joseph entered and tried his best to ignored the emptiness… the darkness… the loneliness that this home always seemed plagued with.

Even if it wasn't the same home as before… Joseph could still remember a time when the Castellanos residence was vibrant… filled with light and happiness.

But those days were long… long gone. Now, the only memories that remained were painted red with pain and whiskey. Filled with drunken nights and painful days… talks of suicide and desperate pleads… the memories here were painful even for Joseph.

There were no good memories within these lonely walls.

Even still… he needed to be here. Joseph needed to be reminded of Sebastian… and this lonesome house – with its solemn shadows and empty rooms – was the only place he could think to come.

Pulling off his shoes and putting his jacket on a peg, the Canadian walked slowly through the home that smelled of biting liquor and bitter cigarettes. Passing the kitchen, Joseph went straight to Sebastian's bedroom. Part of him imagined how relieving it would be to find Sebastian lying there – drunk as usual – but fully alive. Discover that these last few moments or hours had been nothing more than a nightmarish daydream he had out of guilt for their fight…

But when he entered the doorway, Joseph found the bed completely empty. Disheveled from the rousing of his partner that morning.

His heart sinking deep into the man's stomach, Joseph stood there for a long moment. Examining Sebastian's bed and the contours of its sheets. The disorder of pillows and blankets strewn about it Sebastian's messy morning way; who never bothered to make his bed. Not like Joseph did.

After watching – wishing to find his partner wrapped up somewhere in those chaotic folds – Joseph finally entered the room and sat down on the bed. He didn't move for a long moment; only sitting awkwardly there on another man's bed. Once again, he felt like this was intruding into the man's space… felt as though he should just get up and leave. But the truth was… Sebastian wasn't here anymore. The man didn't have a 'space' anymore. He didn't have a house or a car… or a job anymore. These things were all still here… but they were no longer his.

A dead man couldn't own these things.

Joseph didn't remember the moment he lifted one of Sebastian's pillows into his arms, gripping it tightly to his chest. However, hold it he did… the cotton pillowcase smelling faintly of his partner. As he held it, the leather of Joseph's gloves creaked with an abnormal loudness in the silent home while he clutched the pillow tighter. Soon, tears began to sting his eyes before rolling freely down he cheeks. Lily… Myra… Sebastian… all of them were gone and they were never coming back.

Joseph always prided himself in never portraying pain… keeping it to himself and only ever crying in the safety of his apartment… but he couldn't stop the sudden sobs. He felt vulnerable, embarrassed even as he cried in the empty house. However, Joseph couldn't help it. He had lost his partner, his friend… and as it was finally sinking in that Joseph would never see Sebastian again… never hear his voice or feel his touch again… Joseph realized he was alone.

That night, the detective slept there… unable to leave the memories of his partner…

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you guys liked it ;u; again, sorry it's so short OTL


End file.
